In my darkest moments, you listened to me.
When my heart was broken, raw and aching for love, you offered a safe, warm, empathic field in which I could break as much as I needed to.
“Break more. It’s safe here”, you said.
When I was lost, you did not try to save me.
When I was scared, you did not try to take away my fear.
When I wept, you wept with me.
When I felt I couldn’t go on, you allowed me to rest.
When my certainties fell away, you blessed my doubts.
You did not abandon me when I was at my worst.
My negativity did not scare you. My dark fantasies did not threaten you. My flaws were not repulsive to you.
And when I pushed you away, you stayed.
(When I abandoned the world I was not abandoned by the world.)
When I forgot you, and I needed to forget you to remember myself, you did not forget me.
You remembered me.
When I felt unlovable, you remembered me.
You never tried to heal me, yet I was able to heal in your presence.
You never gave me answers, so I found the courage to find my own.
You never gave me advice, so I leaned to trust my own unique path.
You showed me a kind of love that was possible here.
You showed me a way through the hell realms of myself.
You helped me to learn to tolerate, and then love, the night within.
Yes, in my darkest moments, you listened. And that made all the difference in the world.
~ Jeff Foster
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