Not everyone will heal in this lifetime. It’s important that we accept and understand this. The perpetual emphasis on acknowledging and healing trauma is a beautiful thing, but its not for everyone. Because some of us don’t have the capacity to heal. Some can’t even get out of bed, because of the weight of their pain and the complexity of their trauma. Too much has happened, and there is no possibility of transformation. This is very hard to accept in our toxic positivity culture, one where trauma is the new buzz word and where people forget that they are not walking in someone’s else’s shoes. Just because you were able to heal parts of your past, doesn’t mean everyone can heal parts of theirs. We have all lived in a trauma inducing culture. Some of us didn’t make it through in one piece. That’s a fact. And if we can just accept this, and honor and comfort them as they are without any effort to ‘heal’ them, we actually stand a chance of co-creating the kind of trauma-sensitive world that avoids this level of suffering altogether. Because trauma is perpetuated by insensitivity. Our tendency to turn a blind eye to the truth of people’s suffering, to shame them for not healing, to blame it on their karma and their choices, is precisely the dissociative consciousness that perpetuates the trauma cycle. You want to help, but you just make it worse. Better to accept people right where they are. Better to provide comfort to the fallen ones. That alone will heal the world.
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