By Humberto Braga

Avoiding conflict in relationships can seem deceptively comfortable & safe, but it’s no substitute for trust. You must be able to trust that what you say will be heard, truly felt, and respected, and so does your partner. If you and/ or your partner is averse to conflict, you might find yourselves burying your emotions to please each other and avoid problems. This illusory peacekeeping only drives us further from each other, instead of keeping us closer. It turns what used to be a two-way street of heartfelt connection in to a one-way street of sacrificial appeasement. The depth of intimacy you used to share, and the passionate bliss it brought, will gradually erode… and it will take the relationship with it.

Being true to yourself is a vital element for progressive conflict resolution in an intimate relationship. It’s necessary to be honest and courageous when you’re disappointed, in pain, or not getting your needs met. Even the most remarkable of romances go through periods of sadness and frustration. In fact, it’s often because a couple has overcome a challenge together guided by intimacy and honestly that their passion is most aroused for each other! So don’t avoid conflicts if they show up. Be present with them and with your partner, honestly & fearlessly, knowing with all your soul that you and your partner are up to any challenge.


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